Romancing the Blog | Romance Authors and Readers Who Blog

I love Chuck Bass. Seriously. I have such a schoolgirl crush on him it’s not even funny.

So what’s the problem? Well for starters, he’s a fictional character.

For those of you who don’t know, Chuck Bass is a character on the CW show Gossip Girl, played by the scrumptious Ed Westwick.

I really shouldn’t even like Chuck, much less love him. He’s everything I don’t like in a guy – arrogant, rude, mean, mischievous, manipulating. Machiavellian doesn’t even begin to describe Chuck’s many schemes. He drinks too much, goes through young, nubile women at an alarming pace, and throws insults around like other guys throw punches. And the way Chuck dresses, well, let’s just say he’s a little too fond of argyle for my tastes.

But I still love him. Why? Because he’s a great character. He’s flawed and fascinating at the same time. And I just can’t stop watching him.

Writers learn a lot from reading other writers. But I also find myself drawn to television shows as well, examining their story elements, arcs, and more. Want to learn how to end each chapter with a cliffhanger? Tune into Prison Break and see how they end each segment before the commercial break. Want to hear rat-a-tat dialogue? Watch Grey’s Anatomy. Want to inject some humor into your romantic suspense? Try NCIS and its unique brand of serious, yet funny storytelling.

But nobody, nobody, on television right now does romance better than Gossip Girl.

On Gossip Girl, you’ve got the middle class boy (Dan) wooing the rich, reformed party girl (Serena). The rich kid with daddy issues (Nate) getting involved with an older woman. The old flames who just can’t seem to let go of each other (Lily and Rufus). Each of these relationships is interesting and funny and even poignant in its own way.

But then, there’s Chuck and Blair – my favorite couple on television right now.

What makes Chuck and Blair so special? Because they’re so perfectly matched. Blair Waldorf (as played by the luminous Leighton Meester) is as arrogant, rude, mean, mischevious, and manipulating as Chuck is. Blair smiles even while she’s twisting the knife in your heart. And watching her and Chuck make up, break up, fight, plot, and continually scheme against each other is soapy drama at its finest. In short, Chuck and Blair are epic – just the way Logan and Veronica were on Veronica Mars.

Chuck and Blair are each strong, interesting characters in their own right. But when you bring them together is when they (and the show) come to life – when the sparks and insults really fly. It’s the same kind of magic we romance writers strive to create with our own heroes and heroines. And it inspires me to craft a story that someone out there will enjoy just as much as I do Gossip Girl.

I know I love it. Until next time. XOXO.

What about you? Which characters do you love no matter what they do? What are some of the television shows you like or that inspire you in your own writing?

My oldest kid turned fifteen yesterday, which made me feel a whole lot of things at the same time. Old, proud, and sad. Old because geez, that time is flying by faster than I can keep up, proud because she’s turning out to be quite the young lady, and sad because I know it’s only a matter of time before she’ll be off on her own, and there’ll be one more empty room in my house. A room I’m not quite ready to see empty.

Sigh.

It’s hard to believe this kid went from being a seven-pound, five-and-a-half ounce baby girl into a teenager, that she would ever go from needing to hold my hand every second of the day to asking me to leave the room so she could be alone with her thoughts, or her friends. But the nice part about this age is the time we do spend together, the common ground we have found in, of all things, our age difference.

She has an almost insatiable curiosity for what I was interested in when I was her age. What music I listened to. What books I read. What TV shows I watched. Where my friends and I hung out, what we did…a thousand questions, nearly as endless as those “why is the sky blue” questions of her preschool days. She’ll “discover” a band like Led Zeppelin and then ask me if I liked them, what my favorite song by them was, and then if I also had ever heard of bands like Van Halen, The Who, The Ramones.

Sometimes I have to laugh. Have I heard of them? Uh…yeah, just a little .

But it’s been fun. Introducing her to music I loved, singing along with her when I remember the words. Or showing her a book I loved at her age, and sharing it with her after she reads it, too. Curling up on the couch with her, a bowl of popcorn between us, to watch a movie from twenty years ago, and enjoying it all over again, through her eyes.

It’s like living my life again, but without the pimples.

There is, of course, the teenage drama. The angst. And yes, the arguments. Part and parcel of anything ending in teen, but it’s been tempered by the relationship built around common ground, something I hope will keep us tethered, at least a little, when the “teen” drops off her age and she becomes a full-fledged woman and leaves the nest for good. I’ll be devastated, but also proud, and anxious for the day she has her first child.

Because there are an awful lot of books, CDs and DVDs I’d like to share someday with a whole new audience. It worked for one generation. I figure it can’t hurt to try it with the next one, too .

Shirley

I have a personal issue that I normally wouldn’t air in such a public forum, but I’m betting a number of you have this same exact issue, and really it’s time we all came clean.

My TBR pile is out of control.

Not only is it out of control, it has kind of taken on a life of its own. There are books living in there that are so not something I’ll read. I know, I know, if I won’t read them why are there? Easy answer–because they were either 1.) Free or 2.) Cheap. C’mon who turns down free/cheap books? Don’t lie to me—I know you have some too.

This issue had been nagging at me for some time, then last week I came across a blog post by another author (sorry I don’t remember who) who confessed to the same ailment. I thought “Okay, enough. I can do this.” And I took action. I started pulling books from the pile that I would never read and….I READ them. That’s right. I READ them.

My choices included a light mystery that at one time in my reading life I would have gobbled up, but at this stage just hasn’t had any appeal. A YA that I got from MIL who did not recommend it, but I took anyway because it was…free. And finally another mystery–hardback no less–also light, that I got at a conference at least FOUR years ago.

And what did I think? Well I finished the first two with no problems. This says a lot for me because I am picky and frequently just can’t force my way through things–especially if the voice doesn’t work for me. The second book I sped read a bit, glossing over parts that seemed unimportant to my enjoyment, but I also stayed up WAY too late reading it. It was a tad addictive. I might search out another by this author. And the third…I just started.

So, now it’s your turn. What is lurking in your TBR long forgotten? Why haven’t you read it?

Then be bold–pick three and read them! If I did it, you can too…

I’m often asked: How do you juggle multiple projects?
The answer, of course: With great difficulty.
And as I get older and my books more complex, with even more difficulty. The way I do it is one job at a time. I might interrupt the completion of a book to write a proposal–or synopsis–of a book I intend to write, but when I do, I concentrate completely on the synopsis. If I can’t finish it, (and I have the time) I put it aside and finish the book. But I never write books simultaneously. My brain just doesn’t work that way.

It’s hard enough for me to promote one book and talk about the characters and story line, when I’m deep into another project. I have to have a copy of the book with me, so I can brief myself and “get into” the old story so that I don’t sound like a complete and utter idiot in an interview or at a book signing. Now, why is this so hard? I can multi-task. I’ve done it all of my adult life.

And that doesn’t begin to touch on series books….oh, yikes on that. If I’ve finished one, am writing the next and pause to start a synopsis of the third. Holy Moly! Just as I force myself to eat a mixture of food during a meal, I have to force myself to work on several different projects. If it were up to my own nature, I’d eat all the peas first, thank you, then work on the potato.

I’m sure this isn’t how everyone handles multiple projects, but it sure is for me.

How much room does a writer really need? This is something that is often touched upon in writing books and articles in the popular magazines on the writing life — the importance of carving out a space to call your own, where you can sit and do your writing. It’s up there with stressing the need to develop a writing habit, where you plant your butt in the chair on a regular basis and get down to business, whether it’s for an hour every morning or half an hour each night or even a frantic twenty minutes stolen from your lunch hour. But how important is it, really?

I’m sure that everyone would love to have an actual room to write in. An office of some sort, with a desk and comfortable chair, some bookshelves filled with favorite volumes of inspiration and research materials, maybe a filing cabinet with notes and scribbled outlines. Perhaps a bulletin board to post hand drawn maps of the world your story inhabits, photos or sketches of the important landmarks in your characters’ lives, or other pictures that help put you in the proper frame of mind for tackling your latest opus. But in many cases, that is not practical. The rooms in your house are occupied already, with children and pull-out couches and televisions or what have you. The garage already houses the cars, plus the hubby’s workbench and the lawnmower and a bunch of recycling bins. So maybe you have one of those armoires stashed in a corner somewhere — the kind where the doors open to reveal your computer monitor and the desk is a tray that slides out with your keyboard. Or maybe you have nothing more than a laptop that you pull out from under the coffee table and plop on the end of the dining table whenever you have a spare moment. Does it still work for you? Can you get your writing done? Or are you surrounded by distractions?

That’s the key, in the end. Not having a room of your own, as fabulous as that is, but having space where you can get away from the regular hustle and bustle of life, escape the noise and movement that tugs at your concentration. Picking a place, and sticking to it, wherever it may be, so that your brain understands when you sit down to work: “Ah, it’s that time, that place, I know what to do.”

When those books and magazines stress having a regular time and place to write, they’re talking about giving yourself mental cues. As your body knows to sleep when you go to bed at night and turn out the light, as your dog knows it’s time for a walk when you pick up the leash, your brain should know it’s time to create when you sit down at your work space to write. Building habits is the true key to productivity, to showing your creative mind who’s boss. Now, I’m not saying your creative mind won’t balk at times, try to fight back, but in the end, more often than not, it will respond to the repetition, to the habit of demanding that it produce for you when you go to that special place of your own. Even if you just curl up with a pad and a pen in a comfy chair at the local library, it can still provide the cue that your brain desires.

So, where do you work? Is it always the same place? If not, are some locations more writer-friendly than others, allowing the words to flow more freely?

Last year there was a great deal of buzz about Wal-Mart only stocking bestsellers and cutting mid-list authors from their coveted shelves. Considering how many books they move, it wasn’t good news for the industry or for readers.

For a while I’d practically hold my breath every time I pushed my cart down the book aisle, afraid I’d find only a few bestsellers and an extra helping of Rand McNallys. And then, one day, the change came.

I found at least three times the number of romances. Yes, there were more. More bestsellers, more mid-list, more romance! My Wal-mart rearranged and came up with shelving for the hardcovers, the bestselling mass markets and the category romances. And on the other side of the aisle, several shelves of mid-list romances along with the perennial backlist offerings of Nora Roberts, Leigh Greenwood and Catherine Coulter.

Several months later, my grocery store of choice—Market Basket—cut down on the toys and moved the childrens’ books under them, making room for several short shelves of mid-list romance in addition to the bestsellers and category. More. Yay!

On the down side, I noticed last week that Hannaford—the grocery store I use if I’m on that side of town—is no longer carrying category romance. They had their grand opening the weekend of my wedding, so for fifteen and a half years I could throw a Harlequin or Silhouette into the cart on my way to the registers. Now they have picture books, the top five or six bestsellers and a selection of Sudoku books.

But overall I’ve seen an increase in the shelf space for romance in general and mid-list in particular. How about where you are? Have you seen the dire predictions come to pass in your area, or can you still buy your happily ever after and your Tide with Bleach in the same store?

Have you heard the one about the young woman who decided to auction off her virginity to fund her master’s studies in marriage and family counseling?

It’s not a joke, actually, and “Natalie Dylan” (as she’s calling herself for the duration of the stunt) isn’t the pioneer you might think. Dig past the recent entries in the Great Big Book of Google and you’ll find several such stories, though Nat’s aggressive marketing strategy promises to rake in the highest profit to date. This situation has led me to ponder many things, such as:

1. Who wants marriage and family counseling from someone who prostitutes herself with international news coverage of the event? Silly question. The same people who’d buy a parenting book from Lynne Spears.
2. What’s the point of using an alias when pictures of your face and nearly naked body are all over the internet, television, and print media? It’s like she attended a Clark Kent seminar on identity concealment.
3. Where are the bidders coming up with all this money (the bidding is allegedly at $250,000 at the time of this writing)? Imagine that meeting with the loan officer. “Yes, I’d like to take out a second mortgage on my home so I can purchase one-time use of a virgin.”

As I pondered (and my RTB deadline loomed), my thoughts came around to the sort of sexual history I’m willing to tolerate in a romance novel heroine. The range is fairly broad.

Some readers cannot abide the virgin heroine, but I made it into my twenties intact, so to speak, and therefore don’t find a lack of sexual experience unrealistic even in a contemporary—although, if the heroine gets past puberty without figuring out independently how the buttons work, I do wonder a little about her awareness level.

Some readers can’t stomach a heroine who’s had sex, but never good sex—until the hero waves his magic wand and presto! Instant multiple orgasms ensue. I don’t find that unrealistic because many women have unsatisfying sexual relationships. Okay, maybe the magic wand thing is a bit farfetched, but aren’t we told from the first birds-and-bees talk that it’s special when you’re in love? You just can’t sell me on an HEA if the sex remains lousy, so by all means, bring on the magic.

And then there’s the heroine who’s had a great sex life before the hero came along, but she still can’t win because some readers think she’s too promiscuous. I say, good for her. May she blow the hero’s mind with her unabashed boldness.

This, however, is as far as I’m willing to accompany a romance heroine. I read what was marketed as a romance novel a while back in which the heroine had relationships with two men. I could accept that because they were relationships—she cared about each of them and couldn’t choose one over the other. When she picked up a third guy in a bar, I thought, “Ah, she’s going to get him alone and torture information out of him.” Except she didn’t torture him at all when she got him alone. At that point, the heroine became little more than an ambulatory vagina, and I stopped reading. Limit reached. My real-life standards about indiscriminate sex with strangers are evidently too strong to be suspended for a book’s benefit.

Had the book been marketed as UF (where I strongly feel it belonged), I may have reacted differently, but when ”ROMANCE” is printed on the spine, I have certain expectations, one being that the journey toward true love does not include humping every available protuberance encountered along the way. Similarly, I couldn’t read a romance novel about a heroine who voluntarily exchanged sex for money, launching a publicity campaign to glamorize an activity in which most women involved are exploited, abused, and in many cases literally enslaved, giggling all the while about how clever and progressive she is. She might make an interesting character study in aberrant behavior, but I sure don’t want to see her ride off into the sunset with Mr. Wonderful.

Where are your lines drawn when it comes to heroinely virtue or lack thereof, and do you find they vary between romance and other genres?

Once I was invited to the home of an author who is well known for her dark, dark alpha heroes. I was curious as to what her husband would be like. But he turned out to be this big, sweet teddy-bear of a guy, a kind of nerdy engineer who was clearly besotted by his wife of 20+ years and would do anything in the world for her.

This got me to thinking–why do so many of us read and write about these dark, edgy, tortured heroes who drive racecars and slay dragons, then turn around and marry the guy with the boring job and the mismatched socks? There is a major disconnect here between our fantasy men and the men we choose as our life mates–the “good husbands.”

For example:
Fantasy Men are dark, dangerous and mysterious.
Good Husbands don’t have secrets. They tell you anything you want to know, sometimes more than you want to know. They’re SAFE.

Fantasy Men are arrogant and controlling. They have a sense of entitlement (per one publisher’s guidelines)
Good Husbands are nice. They’re flexible, accommodating and quietly confident. They don’t expect to be given anything they haven’t earned.

Fantasy Men are powerful and command respect. They never ask for help and never make the wrong decision.
Good Husbands share power and authority, and they earn respect. They make mistakes all the time but they aren’t afraid to admit them and learn from them, or ask for help if needed. (However, they won’t ask for directions!)

Fantasy Men are tortured souls with bad, bad things in their pasts.
Good Husbands might have sad or tragic pasts, but they’ve gotten past the bad stuff and haven’t let it taint their entire lives.

Fantasy Men consider falling in love with the heroine a weakness, because it’s the one thing in their lives they can’t control.
Good Husbands think falling in love with their wives is the best thing that ever happened to them. They don’t consider emotion a personality flaw.

Fantasy Men are reduced to total incompetence by a crying baby.
Good Husbands can change a stinky diaper in their sleep.

Fantasy Men ride Harleys.
Good Husbands drive a safe car with a baby car seat in back.

Fantasy Men are so dang good-looking that beautiful supermodels fall all over them, but of course they’re never tempted by anyone but the heroine.
Good Husbands might be handsome, but most of us aren’t going to see our husbands in a Calvin Klein ad. And they don’t have that supermodel problem.

Fantasy Men never, but never belch or fart.
Good Husbands … okay, maybe this isn’t the most endearing feature of a real man. But let’s face it. They can’t help themselves.

Granted, I’ve made some huge generalizations here. But by and large, we write about one kind of man, but we marry an entirely different kind. (And if you, a friend or loved one has ever hooked up with Mr. Dark, Dangerous and Tortured, you know why Mr. Kind, Safe and Reliable is the better choice.)

So why the disconnect? Why is our fantasy so radically different from the reality most of us choose, a reality that is good for us and pro-survival? Are we hanging on to outdated hard-wiring from our caveman days?

When this post first goes up, I will still be in bed here in California. But a few hours later, I will be walking barefoot through the airport security checkpoint, getting ready for an all-day, cross country trip to a readers/authors gathering.  It’s my fourth conference trip this year, in addition to trips I’ve made for speaking engagements. I’ve turned down other offers, because I have books to write and a family to spend time with. But I’m already scheduled for two conference trips next year, with a few more invitations under consideration.

Who knew writers could spend so much time on the road?

There are a lot of reasons why I go to these events. Some are to expand my knowledge of my craft. Others are for connecting with the readers who spend their time and money on my books. And some are to share a few of my experiences with other writers. I never regret the effort, because I always come away with something new and valuable. I’ve forged beautiful and supportive frienships during my travels, and spending time with other voracious readers like myself is always a treat.

I love to talk about books (not my own, I don’t know what to say) and hear about the authors who are exciting readers now.  I remember reading somewhere that publishing is the only industry that doesn’t ask its consumers what they want. (I’ve heard that the reason for this is because readers don’t know what’s going to be the next big thing until the editors discover it and put it out there.) So for me, the face-to-face connection with readers helps me see what’s happening now and what they’d like to see more of. It’s certainly not a comprehensive poll, but it is very interesting!

So while I’ll be up before dawn to write before the day begins, I’m still looking forward to the trip and the new friends and memories I will make while I’m gone.

Have you attended any conferences this year? What do you get out of them? If you haven’t been to a conference before but plan to eventually, what do you hope to get out of the experience?

Serial killers, depravity, warped sensibilities, scary people… If I’m being honest, I’m kind of tired of seeing the dark and twisted side of things.

There are people I know who really enjoy exploring the dark side of life. They are interested in really understanding the psyche and figuring out what makes people tick…particularly bad people.

I’m not one of those people.

The happily ever after that is built into romance–and romantic suspense–is the core of what I like about the genre, and when I read it, the happily ever after is the thing that keeps me turning the pages. The dichotomy between the extremes of dark suspense and happily ever after, while highlighting the importance of love and the renewing spirit of humanity, still illustrates the evil that permeates our everyday lives, even on the periphery. It can be so disturbing that it sucks the happiness right out of me. I begin to fear who lives next door, wonder if there’s a lunatic watching my kids’ schools, worry that something dark and awful will befall someone I love.

I don’t like those feelings. At all.

I know evil exists. I know misfortune exists. I’ve been touched by it. What I’ve found, as I grow older, is that I don’t particularly like being reminded of it in the books I read. Don’t get me wrong…I don’t live with my head buried in the sand. I’m socially conscious, believe in serving, and put myself out there to help and be part of the world around me. I work hard to emphasize social awareness and servitude to my kids so that they understand the lottery they won by being born in the United States, the privilege they live with, and the fact that they are blessed in a world where not everyone is so fortunate.

I don’t take my life, or my good fortune, for granted.

So why do I shy away from books that highlight the dark side of humanity? In my books–both those that I read, and those that I write–I want to escape. That’s not to say that the books I read and write are fluff; they’re not! I read a wide range of books with a wide range of themes. Many are character driven books that explore personal journeys. They’re not all romances. They just don’t typically have to do with serial killers. The bottom line is that I like to see the more positive side of life, and sometimes fiction is the only way I can get there.
Hurricane Ike can be raging all around me–as it just did for so many, but in my fiction world, it’s sunny and bright and through the struggles, there’s always a rainbow. I reach out to help, care about the people who are suffering, and at the end of the day, a book that sees life in a more positive light is the thing that keeps me going.

At RWA’s National conference last year, Lisa Kleypas gave the keynote address. I remember her telling a story about her ravaged town and the destruction of her house. She talked about how she and her mom visited Walmart to stock up on basic supplies. When they met up after their shopping at the checkout line, they both had–as part of their necessities–a romance novel. The uplifting spirit of such a book is renewing and we all need that every now and then, especially in the face of our own everyday tragedies and struggles. So, in general, the dark, dark suspense is not what I turn to anymore.

I know that SO many people LOVE romantic suspense and get the renewal talked about above from those books because there is a happily ever after. There is love and redemption and people who survive at all costs. If you love romantic suspense, how do you separate yourself from the darkness in the books and the darkness in our lives and in our world?