Can you feel the hot, fetid, cranberry sauce-scented breath of the holidays gusting across the back of your neck? I can and, because things move a little more slowly in the book industry, I’ve probably left this letter a little too late. But maybe the jolly guy has a few romance-loving elves willing to work a little overtime.
Dear Santa,
I’ve been a (mostly) good girl this year. Okay, well, to be honest it might depend on your definition of good. I haven’t killed anybody. So I’d be really grateful if, besides a new Palm T/X under the tree, you could enact a few changes within the romance industry…perhaps whisper in the ears of sweetly slumbering editors?
First, I’d like historical westerns to be the new vampire. I know a few editors are willing to look at them and there are some on the shelves here and there, but a clamoring would be nice. Just a minor one, even. If that’s not possible, can you at least slip a note into my stocking explaining to me exactly what Almack’s is and why everybody wants to go there?
Second, I’d really like the contemporary cartoon covers back. I know…I’m probably one of maybe five readers in the world who loved them, but they were eye-catching and funky and really represented the stories well. Fun is good.
Third, I’d really like to be able to peruse the romance aisles at Borders without my children and I being bombarded with cover photos of naked people obviously having sex and/or titles I’d like to bleach out of their memories. I know wicked-hot is in, but subtle covers are sexy. Ask Mrs. Claus and I’ll bet she agrees.
Fourth, could you make trade paperbacks really unpopular? It’s so hard for me to pay $15 for a romance when I can choose from a large selection of $7 ones and even a nice rack of $4 ones. And when the book I really, really want to read is only available in a format my stay-at-home-mom guilt won’t let me splurge on, it’s very frustrating. I did find some mass-market Bravas at my Wal-Mart and jumped up and down in glee.
And finally, could you make it so the publishers have two ARC lists—an early shipment for review magazines with lead times and deadlines and then a second shipment to bloggers and online review sites? It’s very frustrating to me when the online book reviewers and big review blogs—plus a bunch of bloggers who’ve otherwise scored ARCs through contests or being friends of the author—create a huge buzz about an amazing book, and then I find out I can’t get it for 2-3 months (at which point I’ll have forgotten about it). While Romantic Times and the like need theirs months in advance, wouldn’t it make more sense to have all the online buzz come at a time when non-preordering, impulse grocery store/Wal-Mart/brick & mortar Borders-buying readers like me (and a great many other women) can buy them?
I know that sounds like a lot, Santa but, as I said, I’ve been (reasonably) good this year. And I’ll leave some Doritos and Dunkin Donuts iced coffee out for you. (I know it doesn’t seem like a lot of coffee in the bottom of the cup, but it took me a long time to write this letter to you.)
With kisses, hugs and snowflake-covered kittens,
Shan
Your turn! If you could ask the gift- or wish-granting entity (real or otherwise) of your choice for a change in the romance industry—for the chance to influence the market—what would you ask for?
No related posts.
I have to say I’m with you on the trade paperbacks. Yes, all my print books are trades, but it’s such a Catch 22. Small press produces trade which are more expensive, hence they sell less, hence small presses stay small.
I’d also ask for some magic spell to make editors read faster [me included!] So proposals and partials and fulls would get through the queue at lot quicker and shorten the tortuous waiting times!
I’d ask for two connected things:
1. More plus-sized females where their size is a reality in the book but it’s not an issue. Sort of like interracial romances where the fact that it’s a white man, chinese woman for eg is made obvious but it’s not an issue.
2.More females who are plus-sized but are NOT curvy. Too often I feel as if the writer ‘redeems’ a plus-sized woman by reference to her ‘curves’. Ok, I want heroines who’re plus-sized/overweight/fat/size 16+ but if they lost weight, maybe they wouldn’t have hips and maybe their asses would be flat and maybe their breasts are basic C cups. So in the book, they’re plus-sized but still, they don’t have any curves to talk about really! Am I asking too much here?
And though I say size 16+, I’m cognizant of the fact that the average romance heroine may be a size 10 or something so could 12+ heroines get some action please?
Another connected point – 3. Interracial romances between two minorities. Wahey for a blackanese combo once in a while!
*sigh* I already had my talk with Santa, and he said I’ve been too bad this year.
I guess I’d just tell Santa that I’m your BFF, cause you asked for everything I want. That is, unless Santa thinks you haven’t been good enough, in which case, I’ll just plagiarize the heck out of your letter, and make it my own
.
Well, as a blogger who gets a few ARC’s,
I don’t make my posts live
until the book is for sale on Amazon
(’cause I live in the online world,
I concern myself with online booksellers).
I actually would like MORE good quality Regencies,
and I would like racially diverse reads
that DON’T refer to race on the back
(because it is such a small part of the story,
it doesn’t need to be mentioned).
I’ve been a very good girl this year, thanks to my children keeping me in line. They even correct my spelling. Here is my Christmas list:
1) More Science Fiction Romance, Time Travel, Futuristics, and those kinds of stories, but with Heat Levels of Sweet, Mildly Sensual, and Sensual.
2) Ditto what Shannon said about the book aisles. They look like porn shops. Almost all romance readers are women and most of us are mothers. Many of us mothers have littluns we can’t go shopping without.:shock:
3) More Interracial Romances!
4) Help me lovingly point out to my caucasion sisters all the wonderful novels they’re missing out on because they overlook our African American sister authors.
5) While you’re at it, please bring more authors of other races along too.:wink:
And thank you for Amazon.com and the giant used bookstores. Like many people, that’s where I’ve gone when the romance industry failed to meet these items on my wish list.
P.S. More Advanced Reader’s Copies to review on my blog, especially Historicals and novels by non-white authors please.
Thanks, Santa. No, I won’t kiss you under the mistletoe. I have my own studmuffin for that.:lol:
P.S. Ditto what Dalia said. I know a lot of readers are here for the fantasy, but I just can’t suspend my disbelief for skinnies. I’m skinnier now, but I weighed 185 lbs on my wedding day to my Hot Viking Prince and he had no complaints.:wink:
Kimber An,
How about ARC’s of novels written by white authors married to Hot Asian Princes?
Oh, drat, but my upcoming book (Breach Of Trust) has an alpha male (my vertically challenged French Venture Capitalist).
And I like Alpha Males, as long as they’re not jerkwads in disguise!:roll:
Hmmm, I’m with you on the Space Operas. More please.
I’d like more really engrossing historical romances with extra exotic settings. Like something set in the Far East trade routes of the East India Trading Company, the wilds of Victorian Africa, or colonial Australia or New Zealand, and then have it be really historically rich, and if you can sneak an Asian Prince in there, all the better. I’d also like to see a twist on the Westerns with perhaps a California Gold Rush, or Yukon Gold Rush story.
I’m also ready for some World War II dramas. There were a lot of desperate love stories unfolding in that time that I think need to be told.
I’d also like the porn off the covers please. I’m all for sensuality, but that is too much. The covers I like best are the ones I can read in public without people’s eyebrows falling off.
I’d also like the cartoon covers back, I thought they were adorable, and so fitting to the style, but only with contemporary stories.
I also don’t like the trade paperback format. The shorter fatter books fit into my hands so much better. It bothers me to hold trade paperback books. They don’t look or feel right, and I have to pay more for them? What a rip off.
More than anything, I just want engaging characters, hot and vicious conflict, and real engrossing plots. Santa doesn’t have to bring us that, we can give that to ourselves.
LOL Kimber An, you’re on my distribution list (okay, okay, you’re on my buddy list, but doesn’t distribution list sound more official?).
And my Alpha male isn’t a jerkwad in disguise. No disguise necessary. He’s out there in the open (Just joking… I think).
Okay, I see there is a rise up against trade paperbacks. I, for one, LOVE trade paperbacks. They fit nicely in the briefcase, I can even tuck them in a file folder, and I can fit more to a bookshelf. But then, I read romance and business books so the formats are similar. And since I’m paying $50 for a 50 page business books, I’m not as price sensitive.
Great post, Shannon! I’m really with ya’ on the covers — I find myself turning certain books face-down around my house because I’ve got young ‘uns at home. (You know it’s bad when you’re ready to use one of your kids’ school stretch-bookcovers to cover your fictional reads!)
I’m with Kimber An and Chessie–I’d love to see more science fiction romances be published. There’s a few on the horizon in addition to the established queens of SFR, but I’m hoping Santa can persuade agents and editors to seek out more (from new authors and established ones).
I’d also love to see more stories and hype about good guy (but not boring) heroes.
Lastly, I’m in the mood this holiday for anti-heroines (and a shout out here to author Sherry Thomas who did a great post on them a few weeks back).
Good guy hunk wins over tortured anti-heroine…now there’s a love story!!
Dear Santa,
I have been much better than Shannon. You must realise that while she was writing this she was neglecting her duty to finish her next Devlin Group book. Therefore, I ask that you grant her requests quickly, so she will get back to the task at hand.
I would like to ask that you make Shannon write faster (but still very well, those DG books need to be tight), so I don’t have to wait til next year for the freakin’ book I want.
I also would like you to have the industry use more discreet covers. I won a bag of books at a conference last weekend that I have now hidden in a drawer in my bedroom, because of the covers and titles. My 8 year old son would be fascinated by them. I feel ashamed to even have them around – what if my babysitters see them?
How am I even supposed to read them if I am busy trying to hide the covers? You do know that I read while waiting to pick my children up at school, right?
Also, Santa. I’m all for Alpha males, but I too would like to just have a good solid (but not boring) hero. I would like to have a story that doesn’t revolve around sex (I have no issue with sex, I like sex, I like reading sex, just not all the time, I like plot better). Frankly, I would like to have the story that I wrote that is like that to find a publishing home, without everyone saying sorry it’s too sweet.
Um… Yeah, Santa, I pretty much agree with everyone above. And on a non-writing related not, can you send us a Wii? Because I’m tired of schlepping around trying to find one and I’m not willing to pay eBay prices for something I can get in the stores (when they’re not sold out) for less. I’m cheap like that.
Thanks Santa! You rock!
I agree with the trade paperbacks…too big to fit in the purse and too expensive to buy with what’s in the purse!
I like a little sex with my novels, but would really like stories that don’t revolve around sex but are more plot/character driven (and I WRITE erotic suspense)…
Tasteful covers are good. I’ve had to hide quite a few in the bedroom from my kids…
And I’d like to ask for more time — either that, or give me the talent to type faster!
Love you Santa!
Dear, Santa,
Please remember that naughty and nice are relative. I’ve been a good girl this year . . . mostly . . . maybe not quite as good as other years, but certainly better than some years.
As to my list — ditto to what Shannon wrote!
Dailia- I take offense. I’m curvy and definitely don’t fit into a size 16, but I see your point.
Hmm, Santa I’ve been good so I’ll second everyone wish list.
Dear Santa,
I’ve been good enough. I mean, you don’t really expect perfection, right?
Book covers. Umm . . . yeah. I’m seriously tired of the the bodice rippers, man-titties and the rest of the blush-inducing “art” on romance covers. Taking some of these books to the bookstore cash register is worse than buying tampons from a teenaged-boy in the convenience store check out line who then calls over the loudspeaker for a price check. Thank god my library went to self check-out. So Santa, would you pass the note along to publishers? If my good enough-ness only gets one gift, I really hope it’s this one.
I’m with Chessie on the historicals in exotic settings. Islands are good. Ships heading to islands are good. Far East, Near East, Middle East, Russia, Western frontier, South America, South Pacific . . .
Non-vampire paranormals. What’s with the plethora of blood-suckers? Anne Rice is born-again. Doesn’t that mean the age of the vampire is over? Please. . . (Well, except for J.R. Ward’s black dagger brotherhood. That’s the exception. Every rule has an exception, right?)
Lastly, I need more shelf space. I have books are under my bed, in two dresser drawers, under the dresser, in the closet, in the basement, on my shelves at work. Would you either a) inspire my husband to take up woodworking and decide to build shelves on every wall of our house, or b) give me some ideas for where I could send all these books that are coming out of my ears?
Thanks, Santa!
p.s. My son asks that you bring him a bike for Christmas–red, with a bell–but if you answer my requests above, I’ll give him the bike and sign your name to the gift tag.
A new one to add: I’d like more edgy inspirationals. I’m a Christian, and I like Christian novels, but why does every book need a third-act conversion? People cuss and have non-married sex and while that might not be my morals, that’s life. I’d like to read something that resembles life.
This is also another vote for “tamer” covers. If anybody at my church saw me reading some of those books, I bet one of the elders would be calling me.
Dear Santa,
Please grant some of the wishes to the folks above. But don’t get rid of the trade paperbacks, or I’m um…toast.
Please unglut the market on urban fantasy so my WIP stands out. Please change the covers as others have said. Please, if you don’t mind, no more vampires, were-anythings. And no more dark eerie street scenes on the cover. I can’t tell them apart.
I would like a new pair of Converse all-stars, a new computer, and a spectacular new romantic fantasy series by someone who hasn’t been forced to write a kick-arse heroine by her editor. A normal woman is fine. Let first person be the next hot thing. And for the love of Mrs. Claus, no westerns, please. I don’t care what race the heroine or hero are, just don’t stick them out West. Oh, and I’d like a pony.
Love,
Ciar
Dear Santa,
I would like more realism (but not necessarily reality) and more heroines that do not fall into either of the following categories:
1) Innocent virginal heroine who has never had a sexual thought in her life (much less done something as natural as masturbating) before meeting the hero.
2) “Kick ass” heroine where the author clearly confuses physical strength and “bitchiness” with inner strength.
I would also really like to see more books where perfect sex does not equal true love (and vice versa!).
And finally, if Paranormals could go out of fashion, I would really appreciate it (not disappear, just shrink into a suitable subgenre).
Selene
Oh Yes! Please Dear Santa, let western historicals be the new paranormal. My favorite genre to read and write is WH and I would love to see lots more every month.
And please Santa, let more and more backlist of my keeper shelves books be released in eformat. I truly would love to have my entire library in ebooks. There are some big holes I would like filled so I never have to be without those books.
And lastly, Santa, I would add my request to others for less overt covers They may be beautiful and they may be provocative, but they just don’t fit my mom type lifestyle and when I buy a book I really do want to be able to take it with me everywhere and enjoy it while I wittle away the hours at sporting events, pediatrician offices, dentist offices, etc.
Thanks Santa!
Don’t have much to add Santa. Everyone pretty much covered it.
* more diversity in romance books hero & heroines
* more diverse romances – interracial, african american, latino, multicultural, multi-ethnic, etc.
* less vampires and werewolves in paranormals or urban fantasy novels
* no more mislabeling books as erotic romances that are just books with really hot sex in them.
* no more books mislabeled as erotic romance which are just erotica.
* realistic looking heroines who aren’t a size 6 or 8 but a healthy 10, 12 or above whose sexy and fit
* I’m not a mother unlike others above, though I do have impressional nieces and nephews. But I’d also like to put in a voit for tamer covers. I would like to be able to read the books I read and enjoy out in the open with out sticking a book cover on some of them. Especially at work. Because the cover just adds to the curiousity of nosy co-workers.
* I’d also like a laptop, my manuscript to knock the socks off my dream agent and representation offered and a fabulous book deal, and a pair of Jimmy Choos (you know the ones) – size 8 1/2.
I’ll add to the chorus. I just hate it when I’m reading a book and I realize I don’t want to take it out to basketball or soccer or what have you, because of the cover. It can even affect my buying choices when I’m on the fence.
Subtle is great when it comes to covers.
I had a BLAST reading these! Santa’s going to be a very busy man.
And it’s nice not to be alone in a lot of these wishes. I’m definitely ready for some market swinging.
And for the love of Mrs. Claus, no westerns, please.
Dear Santa,
I just wanted you to know there have been rumors Ciar was a naughty, naughty girl this year. And she ate your cookies.
Shan
I’ll join Cair with the plea that Santa doesn’t get rid of the trade paperbacks. (Or alternatively, that the mmp publishers start accepting m/m erotic romance, I’d be perfectly happy with that alternative as well…)
As for the calls for less steamy covers, can this desire for less overt steaminess apply to the ebooks as well as the one on dead trees? Because when I’m doing the cover art worksheet for my books, I always request less rather than more nudity. *I* don’t want to be too embarrassed to put prints of my cover art on the wall. And while my publisher has never put pressure on me to go for the soft porn look, I see an awful lot of advice out there that skin sells…
Oh, Dear Santa,
Please, oh, please give me a plot so I can finish this damn book!
If we have to keep trade paperbacks around for the small presses, please make them more affordable so more people will buy my book (which has a tasteful cover, BTW).
And while you’re at it, will you throw in some attic insulation, too? Don’t tell me to fill it with books because I already considered it.
Dear Santa,
Please, to have editors/publishers stop thinking in such defined terms. If a book straddles and even overlaps a fine line between two genres, it doesn’t mean it’s unsaleable.
On a related note, Santa, could we please smack the editors/publishers (gently, because it is the season of giving and all that and I know you’re anti-violence) but anyhow, could we smack them with the Clue By Four so that they don’t assume the reading public is too stupid to walk upright? Really, give them a good book, and they can read it and understand it.
Oh, and Santa, can we get people to understand that just because a hero isn’t an in-your-face Alpha, doesn’t mean he’s not strong and capable?
I’ve been a very good girl, Santa– I haven’t pouted much and didn’t take any contracts out on anyone– pinky swear. So can we work on opening people’s minds to the fact that there are really good stories out there waiting to be read that don’t necessarily fit into a neat little box.
Ta, ever so,
Me.
P.S. The setting the stove on fire when I was twelve? Yeah, I finally confessed to my mom. So can that count as being a good girl? Pretty please?
My Santa PS: Um, can you hold off on all the no more paranormal vampire thing until after 2008 when we have sold out of all of our Vampire Oracle stories, please. It’s my biggest contract to date and I’d really like it to go somewhere. I’d really like to be able to buy the larege pizza in 2008 instead of the small. I do have three kids Santa. And did I mention the Wii?
Oh, Santa, I meant to say no westerns except for Shannon Stacy’s, okay? Hers go right to the front of the store.