You’d be surprised at some of the things people say when they learn I write erotic romance writer, especially if they knew me as an accountant in my former life. I swear, sometimes they shock me! And if they’ve read a book or two, let me tell you, all bets are off as to what they’ll say. I suppose they wonder how an accountant (we do have that reputation for being a little boring and staid) could actually write my genre of story. And it’s totally shocking when a coworker says, “Oh my God, let me tell you about when I did THIS! Maybe you can use it in a story!” I’m covering my ears going TMI, TMI!!!! But of course, I do store away the little nugget of an idea for later use. Now here are some of the common things people say, but also a few that really made me smile. My favorites, however, are from the older generation. It’s totally surprising what comes out of their mouths. And they don’t even crack a smile!
1) After a certain point, I imagine your husband needs Viagra. (I’m not quite sure whether that one was an insult)
2) Can I help with your research? (my male ex-boss, OMG!!!)
3) Could I do some hands-on critiquing for you?
4) Don’t you have to have more than one person involved for it to be called sex?
5) My husband raves about your books to all his guy friends. And he hasn’t even read one of them yet!
6) Isn’t there only one way to do it?
7) How can you write a whole book about it? It only takes two minutes.
That’s like the “funny” sex my husband made me do when we were young. Sometimes, it made me faint. (I was afraid to ask this lovely elderly lady for details!)
9) So that’s how you have phone sex! How does one go about finding a young man to try it with? I’d even settle for an old man (my 89-year-old neighbor!)
And my personal favorite:
10) I gave your book to a friend as a present, but I covered all the naughty parts with sticky notes. (Single-handedly, she keeps the sticky note people in business!)
Now, if I told you who said that, she’d disown me!
If you’d like to know what they’re all talking about, please try The Fortune Hunter by Jasmine Haynes, a scorching, sexy tale of a woman who agrees to be her own husband’s uninhibited mistress. No holds barred. Hmm, I think they might be doing a few of those “funny” things, but I hope no one faints while reading! And oh my, there’s a bit of phone sex in there, too! Bring out the sticky notes!
I do have a question about the sticky notes, though. Couldn’t her friend lift the sticky notes and read what was underneath? These are the mysteries that an erotic romance writer must ponder. What mysteries do you ponder? Or, if you’d just like to share a funny story, I’d love to hear that, too!
No related posts.
Sounds to me like the sticky-note lady was helpfully marking all the good parts for her friend.
Angie
Oh my goodness, you’re right, Angie! That naughty lady.:eek:
BTW everyone, thanks so much for having me here at Romancing the Blog!
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
Wow, some of those are just sad! And I would very much appreciate the sticky notes – wouldn’t want to miss a single spicy part! LOL Not that there would be a chance of that anyway… I devoured every word in ‘Somebody’s Lover’, spicy or not!
*laughs*
Sometimes it surprises me how uninhibited “old people” can be about sex. When my mother and my grandmother found out I had been reading their “trashy romance novels” it was my grandma who said to my mother, “Don’t be so shocked, I read the same thing when I was her age!” And then later offered to let me borrow some of her other books!
You should start a list.
Thank you, Jennifer! I’m so glad you loved Somebody’s Lover. Lots of stickie notes in that one! Although my mother did say that she loved that book despite “the naughty bits!”
And JC, your grandma and mom sound wonderful. I adore elderly people. Many of them are so uninhibited, I’m almost shocked! Then again, they no longer care what other people think, which is great. I want to be like that! I’ve written several elderly characters in my books. My two favorite were Grandma Blue in Jennifer Skully’s Sheer Dynamite and Ladybird Long in JB Skully’s Max series.
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
Ah, Jasmine, I’ve been reading your writing since … well, you know. Back before either of us published. You just keep getting better. I can’t wait to read THE FORTUNE HUNTER!
Vanessa Hart
Thank you, Vanessa! You’re so sweet. And a wonderful critique partner! I hope you like The Fortune Hunter just as much. And yes, there’s an octogenarian in the book as well! Better buy lots of stickie notes because the scenes do get quite hot, I’ve been told. I love the cover of this one, it really sizzles. And I’ve got a movie trailer on my site!
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
Just stopping by to say hi!
Love your post today! Needed the laugh!:razz:
Hey, Kristen, thanks for saying hi!
And Ericka, I’m glad I could give you a laugh!
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
BTW, Ericka, I love the title of your book!
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
I don’t write erotica, but my books have a little steam. When I first started writing, my son would sneak onto my laptop when I wasn’t looking and insert naughty bits! That’s when I decided to password protect my computer.
ROTFL!
This reminds me of the time my big sister stumbled across one of my J R Ward books. They’re not strictly erotic, I know, but she read the sex scene and told my mum. Till today they haven’t stopped teasing me about my…um…*special* preferences.
Mum has since stepped up effort to get me a (real) boyfriend.
Which is why I’ve kept my stash of werewolf erotic romance far, far away from my sister’s sticky hands.
And she’s an accountant.
I hope you had a good day blogging and doing all the lovely laundry! Hugs and love to ya!
OOPS here’s the blog addy: http://www.bookreviewsbycrystal.blogspot.com
This is way too funny and oh so true. Most people I work with have said the same thing. It is the way it usually works. But the books are selling for a reason, because they are good.
Thanks all for the laughs …
Oh my goodness, Sandra, how old was your son!?
Dawn, see, it’s those accountants who cause all the trouble. They’re terrible!
Melissa, I agree, people want the books with the hot stuff. Sex is a hot seller (pun intended). And I love writing it, too.
And Crystal, thank you so much for giving me that wonderful plug! To the authors out there, Crystal does a great job reviewing. Please do check out her review blog.
Thank you so much for having me and I hope you all have a great week.
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!
2 minutes!!!! BWAHAHAHA!!!
Number 7 made me laugh and laugh because I write erotic romance and my younger sister said something similar. I replied that it’s fantasy and if you’re real lucky, you’ll find someone willing to reenact certain pages.:grin:
It wasn’t my sister that said “two minutes”, but it was a relative! I felt very sorry, but really, how do you explain it! At his or her age, I don’t think she’s going to find Mr. or Mrs. Right!
Jasmine Haynes
The Fortune Hunter, Berkley Nov 2007
http://www.skullybuzz.com Don’t miss my October contest!