Once upon a time, too long ago, there was an evil man. This man, his long suffering wife and six children all lived in a small village where everyone knew each other’s business but didn’t say anything. The man, being evil, derived great joy out of torturing his animals, his kids, but most of all his wife.
His eldest daughter watched and told herself that she would never be in the same position as her mother. She would never get married. She would always live alone.
And she hid inside her mind from the evil man with his bad words and hitting hands. She read, filling her thoughts with many, many words so she couldn’t hear her mother crying. Her favorite books were animal stories because, although animals did bad things, they didn’t do them on purpose like some evil men did.
Since she had to hide many, many times, the little girl quickly read through the small village library. Until she finally got to the romance section. That section she left until last, even after the two dozen books on car repair. She wasn’t attracted to fairy tales. She knew there were no happy endings in life.
As she stood in front of the romance shelves, she shook her head. At twelve years old, she knew romantic love did not exist. Books of lies she thought.
But books of lies were still better than hearing the evil man yell. So she started reading. By her 20th novel, she noticed that the authors actually believed in this romantic love nonsense. 100 novels later, the little girl thought that maybe romantic love may have happened once to someone somewhere. She kept reading and hope began to blossom.
She applied herself to her studies and her career. Although the evil man had vanished, never to return, the now young woman was determined to be free. Silly young men didn’t distract her. She let three of them kiss her…each exactly once, but she would not let her hard fought for independence go.
Then one day, she met a man, a tall, dark, handsome man resembling the heroes in those silly romance novels she didn’t really, truly believe in. The woman was mean to the man. The man laughed. She ignored him. He talked on and on, walking beside her. She tested him. He faced each challenge with good humor. Five cautious years later, she married him.
Married ten years, the woman and man drop off her used romance novels at the big city library. He is happy to buy them for her because he credits them for their relationship. She is happy to donate them because she knows that in some library somewhere out there, there is another little girl standing in front of the romance section.
And she wants that little girl to live happily ever after also.
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Sweet.
[...] Now that I’ve gotten that off my chest, I must say this RTB post is pretty timely: Kimber Chin’s A Romance Novel Fable. [...]
That’s why all that talk about whether or not romance novels are literary works or serious fiction irks me.
Who the h*** cares what some snotty critic thinks. Romance novels change lives. They make the world a happier, more hopeful place.
Wonderful post, fellow Kimber!
Oh, and I agree with your 8:39 comment too.
Romance Novels taught me that life was supposed to be different than what I grew up in. I write to give back and hopefully one little girl will know that life doesn’t have to be the way it is in her house. Kimber, I’m glad that you saw the truth in time to be happy too.
Kimber An,
Our stories are why I think readers will need romance authors even more today. It is difficult to give relationships a chance when we grow up in split homes, hear about the dismal odds of a marriage working out, etc. etc.
Romance novels give hope (even a cynical gal like me couldn’t argue with the sheer numbers). And hope is needed to make that commitment
Sara,
I love the thought of writing to give back.
My policy is that if I can help even one person…
But the thing is that you may never, ever know if you have helped that one person.
I didn’t realize at the time that authors like Barbara Cartland would change my life years later.
Kimber, this is adorable.
It so funny. I was reading one of my CP’s manuscripts last night and I noticed that the middle of the ms was a lucious romance. It was beautiful and heartaching. The beginning of the ms and the end were all high drama. When I called her on this, she said something like, “I just don’t want to be seen as too sentimental!”
My response to her is that romance is important in everyone’s lives! We wouldn’t procreate (on purpose) without it! I told her she needed to embrace the romance genre–it’s too important to be embarrassed about.
Kimber, I’m forwarding your blog to her.
SWAK,
Lucinda
In real life, a true hero is a man who cuddles and weeps over a sick child, then races all over the city in the middle of the night to find medicine for her. In real life, a true lover is not one who can copulate all night long, but one with the depth of soul to make love to only one woman for a lifetime. So, when I read a romance novel in which the ‘hero’ falls short of that, I chuck it.:roll: Read GAMES OF COMMAND by Linnea Sinclair for the best example of a hero/lover like this that I’ve read in a loooong time.:wink:
Beautiful! Thank you for sharing this wonderful fable.
Gwyneth
My story too.Except I was the 8 year old who was beaten and starved.No mother to protect me .I’d watched her die in my arms,unable to do anything to help.My father never forgave me for that.I escaped when I married.
Excellent post. Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you for sharing. I believe there is a happily ever after for us all. And for some it might not include a wonderful marriage to a wonderful man. It will look different for every woman, and I think that is what’s fantastic about romance books, the diversity out there so that EVERY person can find their fairy tale and live happily ever after.
“I just don’t want to be seen as too sentimental!”
Lucinda, I don’t know how the impression of love as a “weak” emotion got started. Love is one of the most powerful emotions out there.
Absolutely beautiful, reading really does change lives.:smile:
Hugs Maureen. You sound like a true survivor.
I hear you about the guilt. I haven’t figured out how to handle it myself. Other than my tried and tested technique of keeping too busy to think about it (avoidance, big time). We workaholics are usually running from some demon.
“I believe there is a happily ever after for us all. And for some it might not include a wonderful marriage to a wonderful man”
Vivi Anna, I agree.
Or, at the very least, that there is hope for a happily ever after for us all.
I needed this today. I’ve been despairing (as melodramatic as that sounds) for the last few days. You know, everything is awful, nothing is ever going to get better, lock myself in the bathroom and drown out the sound of my weeping with running water kind of thing. This post made me think about how things HAVE gotten better (jeez, did anybody have a GOOD childhood?
), this is just a rough couple of days as opposed to an inescapable situation, and between putting my efforts into making it better and the simple passage of time, this too shall pass.
I’m going to live another 50 or 60 years (knock wood), which is plenty of time for my HEA, whatever that may be, to work itself out.
Hugs Kerry.
Rough patches happen. Sometimes many, many rough patches happen one after another (my mom calls it “having kittens”, as in…just when you think the cat is done with the extremely painful birthing process, another kitten decides to be born).
But that helps us appreciate it when everything magically works out. One of those wonderful days, when you wake up and your hair is perfect, and there’s a seat empty just waiting for you on the bus, and the boss orders in lunch ’cause everyone has been working so hard.
They do happen too.
Thank you for posting this. A great blog! Very affirming.
‘I don’t know how the impression of love as a “weak” emotion got started. Love is one of the most powerful emotions out there.’
Thank you for reminding me of that. I need a jolt like this every now and then.
Kimber Chin, some of us snotty critics are trying desperately to move AWAY from whether or not romances are “good” for their readers. I adored the last two paragraphs of Access Romance Reader’s Gab today for precisely that reason. And I’m detailing on Teach Me Tonight about the recent academic panels at a conference and how “Good vs. Bad” or “Literary vs. Trash” is just not interesting anymore. We’re looking at romance for completely different reasons and some of those reasons are concerned with how the readers create what they need out of the texts, no matter what. I loved your story!
“Kimber Chin, some of us snotty critics are trying desperately to move AWAY from whether or not romances are “good” for their readers.”
Sarah, if you’re reading this blog, you are NOT a snotty critic. LOL.
Self styled “purists” exist in every field (yes, even within romance). However, I think that the romance industry pays them too much attention (awesome work on tackling the Literary vs Trash discussion).
In business, we know that if we talk about our competition even negatively, their sales go up. Stands to reason that if we talk about how romance novels are NOT trash, it will drive some people to think they ARE trash.
Reading romance taught me to believe in myself. That anything is possible. That if I put my mind to it I could accomplish anything. Somewhere along the road of reading romances and writing romances (Hocus Pocus) I met people who shared their knowledge and kindness and made my life all the richer.
So when anyone asks me what I’m reading I hold up the most recent romance in my hands and smile at them. At first some people look confused, even disgusted. “You should read books that will enrich your life.” My smile only gets bigger. “They do,” I reply.
When anyone asks me what kind of books I write, I tell them romances. Again, some people will frown at me and tell me I should write books that are important and teach something. A warm, happy glow fills my body when I smile again and say, “I do.”
So curl up to your lastest romance, a cup of something sweet and warm and know that you are learning something new each day.
Teresa Roblin
Romance is about hope, about love ever after. Along the way I get to learn about different lives, different circumstances, different places, different times. All with happy endings. That’s what I love about it.
Thanks for sharing , Kim. Your post was so moving. I think romance novels give us an example to follow. To have hope. To realize that we are worthy of love. I lived in an abusive marriage and only after I left did I have a relationship that taught me that I deserved unconditional love…just like in the novels I read. Love is redeeming. Love is all that everyone one of searches for, I think. That’s why the appeal is there. And I am thankful for the gift of words that every writer sends us.
I am honored to call you my friend K. You are not only a amazingly gifted writer, you are a testament to girls young and old of strength, loyalty and love. Your heart is always to give back and help others. Your novels are going to change the world (but can I still affectionately call them porn?) Love ya girl!
What a wonderful post!
Kimber,
Great story. You had me hooked right to the last word. It certainly worked for me, girl.
Lovely story…
Funny, I’ve been reading romance for the HEA since I was thirteen…I just happened to marry two jerks who convinced me HEA was just a fantasy…
Then I met my new husband and after dating two months we got married and now I’m a firm believer in the HEA again…
The problem is I’ve got this series started that relies on the not-quite happily ever after…at least not yet theory for their endings…and now I’m happy…this is a problem because I want my characters to be happy now…and they just can’t be happy yet…
Hugs
Roxy
Beautiful post
Love really can be that glimmer of light in the darkness. I think many Romance writers have learned to believe and define love, back when they were readers. We all have some message and thread that is positive (hopefully) If it be empowering women to believe they are equal and deserving, worthy, of the real thing- or my personal fav, stressing that second chances never go away, and each ending is a new beginning, for you to start fresh and leave all the junk behind. Everyone does it wrong at least once. It doesn’t matter where you come from, what you come from, it’s where you’re going and whom is proudly walking beside you. My hubby too, understands the power of romance novel, and the stronger, more positive message they can send. Some are more fantasy than realistic, but most have an element we can relate to, and the kind of love we recognize as attainable. Yeah, even us who were cynics and were hard to win. I noticed the little things after reading romance for 30 plus years, and those are the things I and my characters come to recognize as real love. Romance rocks.:cool::
This made me cry. I think it’s so true, romance is an escape and a healer.