Romancing the Blog | Romance Authors and Readers Who Blog

In January, Silhouette will be ending its Bombshell line. Now I rarely read categories so my comments about Bombshell deals strictly with that line and no other. I am sad that the line will be ending.

Bombshell seemed to have had a rocky beginning. It was a hybrid, not quite a romance, and this seemed to have confused readers. I’ll admit, I prefer a strong romance in my reading. This does not mean the traditional HEA but stronger than some of the early Bombshells had.

The other problem Bombshells had was that it stood on its ear the traditional archetype of the heroine. The heroines were not necessarily the nurturing types of heroines we have come to expect. These were not the heroines of the romantic suspense subgenre who were damsels in distressed and had to be rescued by the hero. These women could take care of themselves. Not all of the heroines in this line were of the kick-butt Buffy/Sydney Bristow mold. Stephanie Feagan proved accountants could kick-butt too. I think it took time for the authors to prefect this change in the paradigm and for the readers to get used to it.

Bombshells, however, have been allowed to develop longer than one book stories. Cate Dermody’s Strongbox Chronicles is a three book series that takes all three books to create the complete story arc. When I first heard the news that Bombshell was ending, I raced to Cate’s website to make sure the third book would still be printed. Luckily it was a December release.

The other series that I panicked, fearing it would not finish was the Madonna Key series. The last book will be out in January with the last of the Bombshells. For six months, I have been enthralled with this miniseries. It is the work of six authors who developed the premise and took it to H/S. The backdrop is mainly Europe, particularly France; the characters are not all American, nor are the heroines innocent virgins (that thought alone would cause Evelyn Vaughn’s Catrina to give a good Gallic snort). And as opposed to some of the early Bombshells, the heroes don’t just stand in the background.

The line seemed to be leveling out and the course was straightening. Unfortunately, the line did not have time to establish itself. I truly hope that H/S and other publishers will see the strengths within the line and allow more books to move out of the tight constraints of the romance genre. In the future, I’d like to see more multi-book miniseries, more books with continuing characters (much like seems to be occurring in the paranormals), more books with strong heroines and strong heroes. I hope this is the Bombshell’s legacy and doesn’t vanish.

Dear Miss Reviewer Chick with a Blog:

I’ve never liked you or your blog, so your post today doesn’t disappoint. Your topic? Banal. Techique? Negligible. And don’t even get me started about the quality of discourse you encourage among fans of your slash-and-burn antics, clearly honed by years spent studying the Talk Soup school of literary criticism. Verily, you’ve got the critical part down to a nasty, tired art, which is why we readers and writers have come to appreciate consistency as your strong suit.

Michelle Buonfiglio
Romance Columnist
romance@ibsys.com
Romance: B(u)y the Book
Romance: By the Blog

***

Ew. I feel so dirty. I mean, I wanted to write a letter in the style of so much of what passes for romance fiction criticism on the Internet, and while it was a little fun to hoist em on their own petards, it wasn’t really satisfying. Especially when I thought about how some folks who write pretty decent literary snarkisism might think it was directed toward them, and feel hurt by it.

That kind of angst has a lot to do with why I write an opinion column about the best new romances I think viewers might like to read, rather than writing traditional critical essays about the novels. It’s also why I eschew even snark; my viewers aren’t served by it. They don’t want to get giddy over what not to buy, they want to know what might be a good buy for their hard-earned entertainment dollar.

Aw, geez, maybe I’m just naïve, but I think we as readers – and readers who write about romance fiction — are really powerful and can move the industry without eating our young. But I also know nasty can feel naughty, naughty blows off steam, and the best place to do that is in the anonymous comfort of cyberspace.

Yet a moment’s mean-spiritedness can hurt book sales, harm careers, dispirit the folks who make the industry thrive: authors and readers. In an Internet atmosphere which encourages “fearless criticism” of romance fiction and authors, I consider myself and others who work hard at being informative, ethical, and entertaining, to be pretty damn courageous when we state simply: This author can do better.

So, set Pollyanna here straight, please. What’s so much fun about nasty on the Inet? How does mean-spirited snarkisism agree with or differ from your definition of what constitutes ethical literary criticism of romance fiction?

It’s funny how life works, isn’t it? I mean, I was reading a book for review and one of the characters was learning to snowshoe. Oddly, just that morning, I’d made my first attempt at snowshoeing. Purely coincidental, but I could totally agree with the character’s equating his ability to stay upright down with success. My advice? When your husband yells, “Hey, look at this!”, turn slowly and deliberately.

Helpful, that’s me.

Then there are other coincidences. I believe I’ve mentioned my RomanceWiki project about a million times, right? It’s going great — and as I build up the past, I learn more about the present. I mean, you can’t really grasp just how popular the doctor-nurse romance was until you scan the list of Harlequin titles released in the late fifties to late sixties. Seriously, those books were all the rage.

So I’m at this party, and I’m talking to a woman who I’ve been told is about to publish her first novel, a mystery. A mutual friend has been trying to get us together for years because we have a lot in common (weird because both of us have been attending said mutual friend’s annual holiday party for about a dozen years).

It turns out that her book was neither her first novel nor a mystery. Way back in the dark ages, she wrote romances for Candlelight Ecstasy. Needless to say, I was fascinated, for the above-noted reasons. We’re talking early eighties and the dawn of sexy, sexy in romance novels. It turns out that there was a lot of throwing stuff at the walls and seeing what stuck when it came to sexy in those days. She recounted the frustrations of editors who “suggested” that authors write on spec, experienced authors who should have been writing to contract. There would be revisions and revisions and then a big “no” because, well, in those days, there was a thing as too sexy.

She also told me the story of the time she was given a week to write a Regency. Now, this was a person who knew less than nothing about the Regency period. Anyone with even a passing familiarity with the sub-genre knows that a week isn’t even scratching the surface. Still, the book got written, thanks to the powerful resources of the New York Public Library and good bit that coincidence I was talking about. Maybe it was another writer with the same impossible deadline, maybe it was a magic elf, but the exact book she needed to get started just happened to be sitting on a nearby table.

She got out of the romance game due to frustration as much as anything.

Then she was laughing and telling me that somewhere in her files, she has old tip sheets — you know the helpful guidelines prepared by romance publishers to ensure that submissions are entirely appropriate for the lines? Yes, I can see all of the editors and former editors out there laughing. She wanted to know if I maybe wanted to make copies for the Wiki. Of course I did. It’s all part of the history.

At the next party (’tis the season and all that), she handed over a manila envelope filled with the tip sheets she could locate. I’ve OCR’d them and will be posting them on the Wiki soon. In the meantime, I thought I’d share a few favorite lines…just to remind us of where we’ve been in this industry — and the end of the year is a great time to relive the past. I’ve copied the lines as printed on the tip sheets (including typos), because, well, as you can see in the example from a love scene, it’s all about sentence structure.

The only pain permitted is the sweet pain of fulfilled (or unfulfilled) desire (Silhouette Books)

Her lips parted at the moist insistence and mastery of his sensuous mouth, and with a stifled gasp of disbelief she felt his tongue enter and probe. Instinctively she began to use her own tongue to expel it, an action that proved to be her undoing… [later] He slid his hand beneath her evening blouse and as, after unclipping her bra, he took one firm small breast into his hand she truly believed her virginity must surely be nearing its end… (Silhouette Books, example of a love scene)

Her figure is always perfectly in proportion, usually petite, and slight of build. He is usually dark, though we have seen some great Nordic types, and recently, we have been introduced to a stunning redhead. [The Other Woman is] usually mean, over-sophisticated, well groomed. She NEVER gets our hero. [Other Characters are] stock, easily recognized, cameos. (Silhouette Books, Character guidelines, excerpts)

She must be likeable, though she may also have some personal problems…Examples: selfishness, jealousy, sibling rivlery, difficulties with parents, stubborness, imagined figure problems, fear of hand ling money. (Richard Gallen Books)

If the heroine is interested in some other men, there should be no more than two. (Richard Gallen Books)

Rape scenes are not recommended. If the author is compelled to do so, only one will be permitted… Should a rape occur, it must move the story forward. Preferably, the heroine is rescued in the nick of time, or it happens to another female character. (Richard Gallen Books)

Ah, yes, it’s always preferable when the rape happens to someone else. We certainly don’t want our heroines suffering emotional trauma. And making your secondary characters stock is always a good idea. It’s not like they’re important to the book. As for the stunning redhead, hello?, I want to read this book. I’m still going through my closet, worried that my day blouses have been mingling with the evening blouses, and, yes, I’ve stopped kissing my husband. Turns out that tongue kissing will be my undoing.

And here I thought it would be petty larceny and gossip.

In these tip sheets, I see the genesis of today’s romance cliches. As I read the guidelines of yesterday, I see story elements that won’t die, right down to the ne’er-do-well brother who needs rescuing. There are suggestions of tortured descriptions to avoid the actual use of the word “penis”. Reminders (in the 1980s) that jobs are good, but women really need a husband and kids to fulfill them. Other women in the hero’s life must always be bad. Heroines should always be able to dress with flair, even on a dime. Certain professions are good, others are taboo.

Which reminds me. The husband read through these guidelines as he was scanning them. He was particularly intrigued by the possible jobs for heroes and heroines, and he came up with the perfect romance:

No-kill matador meets PETA activist in a vegetarian restaurant - hilarity ensues.

You know, we really have come a long way, baby.

Today is the official “pub date” for my latest release, The Stranger I Married and I’m excited! For me, there is a lot of build-up involved in getting ready for a release date. Like most writers these days, the burden of promoting my work rests heavily and almost entirely upon my shoulders. I’m grateful that the success of my previous releases has eased some of the pressure I’ve felt in the past, but it’s just a lightening, not relief by any means. I still do/consider/worry about a lot and it’s draining–creatively, emotionally, and financially. So many factors can affect the sales of a book, not the least of which is the time of year the book hits the shelves.

I’ve been told that February is the best month to have a new release, followed by March, Aug, July and Oct. (In order from best to good.) No Dec or Jan? Hmm… Who knew? *g* Just one more bit of trivia for an author to worry uselessly about.

Maybe everyone is sick of shopping. Maybe some stores won’t shelve the new releases until the first. Maybe distribution is spotty. Maybe I didn’t promote enough. Maybe this, maybe that, maybe maybe maybe…

But right now I’m not thinking about any of the endless number of things there are to stress about. This blog, and the many blogs listed in the sidebars, and the romance novel forums/loops/review sites around the web, and periodicals like Romantic Times, and readers groups around the country are all dedicated to celebrating the joy of books and today a new one was born after a long and laborious gestational period. It is a piece of my heart that I’m sharing with readers and that’s something to celebrate. In the midst of all the business aspects of covers, blurbs, sales numbers, reviews, distribution, promotion, contracts, word counts, ms formatting, etc. etc. it’s lamentably easy to forget what’s most important — the sharing of a story.

So happy holidays to you, and happy birthday to my baby and all the other babies/books that share Dec. 26 as their b-day. There are new books for all of us to read, enjoy, and talk about. I’ll be thinking about that today and only that. All the other stuff can wait until tomorrow.

A Christmas tune for your enjoyment. Imagine Eartha Kit’s come hither voice…

“Santa Baby”, revisited…

Santa baby, slip a romance novel under the tree, for me.
I’ve been an awful good girl,
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa baby, I’d like a publishing contract, too, from you.
I’ll wait up for you dear.
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Think of all the fun I’ve missed,
While writing about the fellas that my heroine has kissed.
Next year she could kiss so much more,
If you’d check off my Christmas list,
Boo doo bee doo.

Santa honey, I’ll take a pile of inspiration, too, from you.
Been an angel all year.
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa cutie, there’s one more thing that I really need…the deed.
To a get-away writing cottage, with a lake.
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa baby, fill my stocking with a laptop, and royalty checks.
Publisher’s ‘X’ on the line.
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Come and trim my Christmas tree,
With some fancy pens bought at Tiffany,
I really do believe in you,
Let’s see if you believe in me,
Boo doo bee doo.

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a hook, for my book.
I don’t mean one that’s been done before.
And hurry down the chimney tonight.
Hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry down the chimney tonight.

Merry Christmas Romancing the Blog readers and writers!

In the hectic pace of preparing for the holidays, my mind was all a flutter with lists, lists and more lists, checking it twice…. blah, blah, blah. In the midst of all the mental chaos, I was trying to think of an appropriate topic for this time of the year.

With a new year on the horizon the general concensus is to look ahead, plan for the future, make resolutions to do something, change something. More often than not, those devout resolutions fall by the wayside in no time flat.

But as we approach the new year, instead of looking forward, look behind you for a moment. What are the things that brought you to this place in time? Who were the friends that made a difference (or not)? What did you achieve that made you proud?

It’s easy to forget the past and easier still to forget those who paved the way for us to be where we are today. In looking at our past and waiting for the future on the horizon we find ourselves at a crossroads–waiting.

On that note take out an old book, one that you loved but haven’t read for a long time. Look up information on some of your favorite authors that you haven’t heard from in a while–send them a note reminding them that they are still important. Review some of those notes and notebooks that you kept when you were fresh in this business and full of energy and excitement. Get inspired! Pop that disk in your computer that still contains your early work. Read some of your early fan mail (and now email). See how far you have come!

We are all in this place, at this time because of everything that has come before us, the good and the bad. In moving into the future it’s important to cherish the things of the past that have made today possible.

I could not be the writer I am today without all the writers who came before me. I could not enjoy the level of success without all the readers who read my work and shared their excitment of it with me. I could not have traveled to so many places and met such incredible people had it not been for the work that I love.

As I move into the new year, my resolution is to maintain the love for what I do, cherish those who have helped to make it possible and hold tight to the foundation of the past that continues to sustain me on those days when I believe I can’t write another word or think another thought.

With that said, I wish you all a happy, healthy, properous and joyous New Year. Just be sure to bring those wonderful memories along for the ride!

Two authors I admire have emphatically different views about watching television. Stephen King insists TV is garbage and you should limit your viewing (or just get rid of the TV completely.) James Rollins when he spoke to my local RWA chapter insisted that television was a great way to refill the well and relax.

When I started writing, I gave up television cold turkey. Oh, there were one or two shows I made time to watch, but with five kids and a full-time day job, if I wanted to write I couldn’t park myself in front of the television for a couple hours every night. That’s where I found my writing time.

But now I’m published and I have a writing schedule that’s working for me. Four of my five kids are in school and the youngest goes part-time to a babysitter to make room for writing. Unless I’m on deadline, I have my evenings free. I read a lot during this time, but after giving up television for nearly three years, I felt a little out of sorts with what people were talking about. How could I be an effective writer when I didn’t know what the most popular shows were and their general premise and storyline?

So as a reward for finishing a book, I now buy myself a season of television on DVD, shows that I had missed because of my writing schedule. (I also discovered re-runs of LAW AND ORDER on cable–talk about a huge time suck! Until this last Spring, I had never seen LO. Now I don’t think I’ve missed one . . . )

The great thing about watching TV on DVD is that there are no commercials. (Okay, okay, yes, I know, I can get Tivo. Or digital cable on demand. But that would fuel the addiction. It’d be too easy to record everything. But I may cave . . . ) Also, I love the commentaries about why the director did this or that.

I saw the first two seasons of LOST on DVD. DEADWOOD. FIREFLY. All fantastic shows with depth of character and a little cutting edge while still being familiar.

Right now, I have the first season of 24 still in the wrapper and CRIMINAL MINDS with the first two episodes watched. (Aside: the jury’s still out on this show. I love the premise, but the characters seem too stereotypical and there’s nothing new or different, at least to me. It seems to be just another cop show. But then again, I read a lot of criminal psychology books so maybe it is new and different to other people.) I’ve been looking at NUMB3RS and VERONICA MARS as potential purchases. And last weekend, I brought home the first season of SUPERNATURAL ostensibly to give it to my older girls who love the show, but in honesty I want to see it. The snippets I’ve watched with them were fabulous.

But I can go overboard. One season of shows, even without commercials, is still hours and hours of viewing time. And what about reading? I have a couple hundred books sitting on my shelves that I want to read, but they keep piling up. For every five books I buy, it seems I read only one. With those odds, I’m looking at years to just finish my TBR piles without buying another book. And I read fast.

So I’m in a bit of a quandary right now. I enjoy television, so now that I have the time I think I’ll tune in more than I have in the past. But to meet my obligations–and read more–I have to tune out some nights. But television has improved since I was younger. Maybe it’s just because I get to pick my viewing choices after the season, when the reviews are in and I can see if it’s something I would like, rather than trying ten different shows each September to only find one that appeals to me.

It’s enough to drive me batty just thinking about it.

What about you? Do you tune in or tune out? Have you found a happy medium? What series were you disappointed in? What series did you miss that you are yearning to see wrapped under your Christmas tree? What’s your favorite television show on today, or a show you hated to see go?

by Sonia Singh

The first thing beginning writers always seem to ask me is, “What is your writing process like?” Well, actually, the first thing they always ask is, “How’d you get your agent?” Followed by, “How much money did you get for your first book deal?” Followed by, “I’m sure Nora Roberts gets way more than that?” Followed by, “So what is your writing process like anyway?”

Hmm. How do I begin to describe my writing process when it’s so sacred and mysterious and unexplainable? When it’s a precious and intimate relationship between me and my Muse that borders on the magical?

Well, I’ll give it a try.

It all begins in the morning when I show up at my computer in a ratty cotton nightgown and with a cup of coffee laced with enough hazelnut-flavored Coffee Mate to give a sugar junkie a cavity. I take a few sips of the brain-nourishing fluid, poise my fingers above the keyboard and prepare to write. Unfortunately, I usually happen to catch a glimpse of my reflection in the screen at this point, which often results in me grabbing a pair of tweezers and ferociously plucking the hairs from the mole on my chin and wondering when I made the leap from hip writer to hag.

With my hairs removed and trying not to feel too jealous of vampires who are lucky enough not to possess a reflection, my routine follows with me once again poising my fingers above the keyboard and preparing to write. That’s when I often realize it’s been eight or so hours since I last checked the rankings of my books on Amazon. Brimming with confidence, I log onto Amazon, positive that whatever I will see will make me smile and add to my self-esteem as a writer. Minutes later my heart nearly stops as I see both my books are ranked somewhere below “How to potty train your Guinea Pig”.

After Amazon refuses to give me the address and “real name” of the reviewer who trashed my book and called me a She-Ape, I cry a little and then take a few more sips of my coffee, say a mantra and then prepare to write.

Thirty minutes later I’ve barely written two words and have fantasized repeatedly about making out with Colin Farrell. With my self-esteem already shot to bits courtesy of a certain online superstore, I’m ready to switch careers or maybe try out for “Dancing with the Stars” in the hope of getting paired off with, yes, Colin Farrell when I remind myself to take it easy because this is normal. This is what I go through every day.

Not exactly a pretty picture, is it?

The reason why I’m revealing all this is because when I get these questions about my writing process, I often sense a feeling of insecurity and fear behind the words. Insecurity over the questioner’s own writing skills and fear that their writing process might somehow be “wrong”.
I want to allay those fears by revealing my own writing process in all its mundane and unglamorous glory. A process that for all its craziness enables me to accomplish three essential things: Write. Edit. Rewrite.

So whether you’re sitting in front of a computer, a notebook or for those of you who like to do it old school, a typewriter, as long as you’re accomplishing those three essential things, your writing process is perfect.

I know writers who show up at their computer fully-dressed at eight a.m. sharp. I know writers who rent out an office space because they need that corporate structure. I know writers who can only work at Starbucks. Then there’s me.

You know, the more I think about it, there is something quite magical and mystical about the writing process and that’s the connection we all make–somewhere between plucking our nose hairs and doing a spell check–with the Universe. Call it God, Source or Colin Farrell but it is indeed divine and special and everyone has access to it.

Just remember that no two writers go about writing in exactly the same way, even the two who routinely show up at Starbucks at the same time, with the same laptop and fight over who gets to sit closest to the outlet and away from the yapping baristas.

I just love that.

Most of us who aren’t genetically blessed with a fast metabolism will put on a few pounds over the holiday season.

As soon as the wrapping paper is crumpled on the floor, ads will be hitting the airwaves for treadmills, abdominal torture devices, steppers, climbers, ski machines and those vaguely indecent looking things you squeeze between your thighs (no, naughty reader, I’m not talking about the ones that buzz).

We’ll start some diet that not only demands the prerequisite suffering, but also that we drop a hundred on nutritional supplements right as our bloated credit card bills are due. We endure, at least for a little while. By spring, the bright and shiny machines are abandoned, the diet a fading nightmare. We end up flushing more $$$ than fat. It’s predictable, it’s boring. Why not consider trying something new this year?

I’m not just talking diets and flab here. It’s not that much different with your reading, if you think about it. We tend to tread in the same ol’ grooves, choosing the same ol’ thing.

Why not change up? Ditch your usual authors. You already know how their stories go. Check out the new and different faces. Buy a new author or buy all new authors for a time. Try a different sub genre. Read with an open, curious mind. Crave surprise. Delight in the unexpected.

Writers, why don’t you try something new too? Go ahead and take the risk that some readers might not find Miss Heroine to be their perfect fantasy selves. Why can’t the heroine get away with the same bad behavior Mr. Hero does? Why can’t Miss Heroine be a bit naughty? Instead of Miss Heroine repeatedly falling into jeopardy to be rescued by Mr. Hero, why not have her rescue him? Geez, don’t have her announce how independent and smart she is all the time while her dumb self needs to be rescued every five minutes.

Along the same line, why not ditch the diet and spend the money you’d spend on the exercise machine on books and a nifty pair of walking shoes? Park your car farther away from the entrance. Take the stairs. Add mustard instead of mayo to your sandwiches. Find a good low-cal salad dressing. Drink water instead of soda.

If people start changing their eating and exercise habits, they could lose that fifteen pounds of flab off their hips sans the funky New Year’s diet and fancy exercise machine nee clothes hanger.

If people start changing up their reading habits, the next big thing in romance might be stories that serve up freshness with a twist and surprises with a flip. The predictable may become passe.

I’d love to see it happen. Would you?

Have a blessed and joyful holiday!