I’m under deadline and I have three major problems with my writing right now: my plot, my hormones, and my butt.
Let me deal with them in reverse order, starting from the bottom. My belly is getting bigger by the day, thanks to my being six months pregnant with my son. This means that whenever I sit for any length of time, my butt aches. At first I thought this was because I’d lost so much weight in the beginning of my pregnancy that my butt didn’t have enough padding. Well, six months in, I have enough padding, believe me. But if I spend any more than an hour at my computer, my backside hurts.
Usually, I am an extremely obsessive writer and like to write and write and write and write until I fall down exhausted. My butt is stopping me from working like this. I need to get up and move and do other things, which means the second problem kicks in: the hormones.
This is probably not news to most people, but pregnancy has made me a ditzbag. I can’t follow a train of thought about my fictional characters for more than a couple of minutes before I start thinking about the fact that my stomach looks so weird when the baby is doing somersaults, the fact that we have no place for the baby to sleep, the fact that I can’t figure out whether I can afford not to go back to work after my maternity leave, the fact that I really, really, REALLY need a bran muffin with raisins NOW.
I know that this admission will make people who are more experienced than I am at breeding laugh at me. Laugh away; I deserve it. I know I’m naïve that I didn’t fully appreciate that my body would take my mind hostage. This lack of focus is good practice for when the baby comes, I know, but why does nature make you rehearse for something by making you completely crap?
My third problem is related to both of these, and it is my plot. Due to the two problems above, whenever I try to think about what should happen to my characters next, I invariably think, “Hey! They should have a baby!â€
Now, the baby plot is a good one. I love a good secret baby or unplanned pregnancy in a romance novel. Thing is, I’ve already done two books (out of five) that have a pregnancy angle this year. And my next book is going to be a pregnancy book, too. I can’t write a baby into this book. It would be falling into a rut, and besides, it’s completely inappropriate for these characters and their conflict. I need something else, something fun and flirty, something…other than a baby. Pereferably with a lot of sex, which doesn’t lead to a baby.
Can I think of a plot? No. My brain is completely controlled by my hormones, and my butt.
Tell me. How do you work through this stuff? And do you have any good plots you could give me?
No related posts.
(P.S. All of this is very wonderful, by the way.)
Take the opposite side of life–death.
It’s hard to help, because I don’t know exactly what characters you have, how many of each sex and what their inter-relationships are. BUT… For a romance novel? ..how about a secret tryst with your lead male with some new female. The inner workings of how everyone feels when the lead female finds out…and perhaps some odd turn.. like her showing up at one of their secret rendevous…with a bottle of wine and some incredable physical speciman of a man, proclaiming “party on”. Just a thought. Good luck with the book, and with the baby.
Dion
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Oh Julie. Pregnant head. No one warned you??????
My favorite was being introduced to someone and 2 min later not remember their name. Or worse, not remembering the name of someone you’ve known for 2 years.
Hugs on the plot troubles. Only advice I can give is to let it come from the characters.
Hey, cool, people are giving me plots! I never thought that transparent ploy would work.
Stacie, three out of five of my last books appear to be death plots too…in a flirty, fun, sexy way, of course. (Ahem. Yes. I do try to write about death seriously but last time I wrote a book in which a lot of people got killed my editor put the words “hilarious romantic comedy” on the back.) Anyway, I’m going to steer clear of death for now but I’m sure it will be back very soon. Good lateral thinking, thanks!
Dion…my heroine with a bottle of booze yelling “Party on!”? That is very far from babies. Thank you.
Anyone else? I’ll take all the plots you can give me!
Donna, everyone warned me. Did I listen? Of course not.
Okay, as far as plots go….. hmmm..
Hmmm……..
Hmmm………..
Okay right now I have a four year old talking in my ear, babbling about wanting to see the smiley she picked out, and I”m looking at the clock going — I GOTTA get to work soon, as well as thinking I need to dress this short blond one…
So I’m empty…
I got nothin’…
Damn, and usually i”m so good at this!
What’ll happen is in an hour, while I’m wrapping my perm at work, I’ll think of something spectacular, then not be able to write it down…. :::sigh::
Although, I will admit, Im alwaywa partial to the love triangle story…. I love it when men fight over a woman… (not literally, but swinging the testosterone around is always fun…)
Hmmm. First, have you tried a cushion for your butt?
I thought you just got a new chair, maybe you haven’t broken it in yet.
Can’t really help you with plot – I suck at plots. Ok, what about a very lifelike baby doll that the H/h thinks is a real baby – and take it in a very humorous direction from there
Hey, I told you I suck at plots.
Boy, can I identify with this post! I’m 7 months pregnant with 2 deadlines coming up. You really have to experience it to believe the way pregnancy can turn your mind to mush! Best of luck with your WIP, Julie! I’d try to suggest a plot twist but it would probably be carrying twins.
I know this sounds strange (coming from me, a given) but my pregger buddies use a cushion donut (like a toilet seat, only classier). It takes the stress off the backbone.
Candice, I appreciate your battling your own distractions to come up with the perfect plot for me. I’ve actually got a love triangle thing with this story…only it’s not, because both the men are actually the same guy, with different names.
Maybe he can fight himself!? Excellent!!
Shaz, the new chair really does help, but my butt is a hopeless case at the moment.
And a doll? Hey, maybe I can combine it with Kimber’s suggestion, about the inflatable donut–an inflatable doll that the characters mistake for a baby! And then the hero fights himself!
This is going to be the best novel ever. Thanks, guys.
Christine! *grabs Christine and whirls her around, that is if our bellies don’t get in the way* My God, it’s good to find someone who is equally at the mercy of her hormones. I hope you manage to meet your deadlines.
What do you think about the inflatable doll/fighting plot?
Do we dare tell her what happens when the baby is actually HERE? Yeah, I thought not.
In my third book, my hero completely won over the heroine by walking the floors with a screaming baby all night. Any man who will do that, letting me sleep, makes my heart go pitter-pat.
But back to non-baby plots…steal something from a fun, hip, ladies magazine like Cosmo or Glamour. Have fun with it!
Donut for the but. (not the kind you eat.)
It’s hard to do plots without knowing your characters and stuff, but here are ones that never get old:
Alien Abduction (my mind is on futuristics today, sorry)
He wins, she looses, she wins, he looses
Marriage of convenience
Marriage of inconvenience: we both want something but if we’re not hitched, we can’t have it. Usually a farm, or Inn.
She was just dying to get out of this town, he’d do anything to keep her here (or vice versa)
Small town, big scandle, even bigger annoying family (Let’s you induldge the baby urge without foisting it on your leading couple)
Good luck!
I nth the donut cushion. You have to wiggle around more when you’re typing while pregnant. If you drink more water, you’ll have to get up to pee more (yes, more!) and that might help
. Or put the bran muffin slightly out of reach, like a carrot.
As for plots that involved inflated things, donuts, aliens, and no babies…I’m sensing a road trip to Roswell in your heroine’s future and an inflatable alien souveneir. Or at least down the ET highway in Nevada which is the road that sort of circles around the famed Area 51. Don’t pick up any hitchhikers!
Ellie M.
Dear Julia,
As a mother of three, I have only this advice: accept that you will have to donate three years of your life to the new life you’re creating. It’s not much to ask. Just three years. It goes by so fast you’ll be astounded. And it is worth it. Believe me.
Don’t worry about plot bunnies, think plush bunnies – and have that bran muffin with raisens. You’ll have plenty of time to write in your life – but having a baby doesn’t happen that often, and it’s precious!
You guys are brilliant plotters. Thank you.
Jennifer, I totally agree with you…a baby is more precious than a book, any day.
However, if I don’t write, I don’t get paid.
It’s a wonderful thing to do, to devote three years or more of your life wholly to raising children. I was lucky enough that my mother was able to do that. For us mothers who have to make money, it’s not really an option, though. Fortunately, writing is a job that can be done at home, in grabbed hours…unlike my other job, teaching. In that way, writing is actually a very good job to have while raising children–I hope.
I’m hoping I can follow in the footsteps of other productive author/mothers–one of the reasons I asked for advice!
Julie, Julie, Julie. Poor thing. You didn’t listen. But, hey… it’s okay. If you’re anything like me, or countless others worldwide, your ears probably stopped working right about the time you heard the words, “You’re pregnant, Mrs. Cohen.”
As for non-baby, non-death plots… Hmmm. How about something with amnesia and a sexy trucker? Sorry, can’t blow it up, but it could cause a lot of blow-ups. Also lots of potential for the unsolicited sex you crave!