In my first year attending local RWA chapter meetings, I was fortunate enough to meet two lovely ladies whose company I enjoyed and whose personalities were a good match for me. All three of us were new to writing romances and had no critique partners, so we hooked up.
A year and half later, I looked back on that group and could only label it as a hugely frustrating experience. Not because the critiques were bad. Not because I fell out with the other two ladies. Nope. Because both of these women have talent, yet neither one of them grabbed the bull by the horns nor ‘went for it’.
They both had valid reasons for not pursuing their fiction writing with gusto — life and full-time jobs have a nasty way of interfering with even the best laid plans — and I easily understood how they ended up where they did.
But I was there once, putting everything/everyone else ahead of my writing, and I know how easy it is to get sucked into giving up your dreams. Now, maybe it isn’t really their dream to write novels, as it is mine, but I’m saddened by wasted talent. My brother died young, never having fulfilled his dreams, so I’m familiar with lost opportunities.
I also understand the challenge in making the dream of being a writer a reality: there’s a wobbly, thousand-foot-drop bridge to cross first. It’s called commitment.
Making the commitment to be a writer is difficult. It’s common knowledge, after all, that a number of us won’t survive the perilous journey to publication. But without commitment — without a wholehearted decision to put your dreams at the top of your To Do list — you won’t make it. You’ve got to take a deep breath, leap the gorge to the other side, and KNOW that you are a writer.
I can only hope that my two friends will find their way to commitment, that they’ll decide one day to put their writing on the front burner.
Because, selfishly, I still want to read their books.
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I joined a crit group the same way–and am fortunate that two out of the three existing members have the “fire in the belly” to work hard, polish, and get out there querying and submitting. The other woman in the group left, and I sometimes can’t help wondering if she was put off by our commitment to seeking publication. But a crit group is not a social support group–or rather, it can be, but critting should come first.
My partners are wonderful writers and have turned into good friends–and I am SO grateful to have them!
I don’t belong to a crit group, but a couple of years ago I met a newbie writer like myself with the same desire–to write, finish and submit a novel. We’ve been Im-ing each other(she lives in Australia, I live in Wyoming!)ever since.
This year, we both had a short story in the same anthology, and we both have novels under contract! Karen Mandeville, my bud, has several.
The encouragement to finish, polish and submit was invaluable.
Agreed!
I have a great crit partner now, and finding a match on the both the personality and the commitment side of things has made a huge difference. She inspires me to write better, to write more, and to send out queries.
I’m very fortunate. Two of my three critique partners and I all have achieved publication. The third writer has two requested manuscripts on editors’ desks right now. At various times, one or the other of us has lagged in our commitment and writing for varied reasons. The others have always been there for us to encourage and support our efforts until we got back on track.
The first time I introduced myself as a writer it felt like a lie. The more I say it, the more I believe it- the more it moves from being a dream to being reality. If it was easy- everyone would do it.