On Thursday, my blog was quoted in USA Today. It was a milestone of promotional importance herebefore never achieved by moi. It wasn’t planned, I never talked to the reporter, nor had any of my respective agents. The reporter just happened to read my blog and quoted it. IN A NATIONAL NEWSPAPER. At first I was terrified, because I knew my writing career was over because I had dared to criticize a book. It wasn’t a romance (not by any stretch of the imagination), but it was still a book. I got some kudos and congrats, and got much hand-holding from my critique partner’s, who assured me that yes, everything is going to be all right, and getting national publicity was a good thing. The moral to this story is that you never, ever know who might be reading your words when you place them on the web… or in a book.
And speaking of words, they’ve been flying. The recent discussions about what constitutes romance, made me consider my own definition of romance. To be honest, I don’t have one, and I’m not sure if anyone can ever use words to create a black and white definition. Romance is neither black nor white. It’s the last page of a book that makes you sigh. It’s the smile on your face when you know that everything’s going to be all right. It’s the promise of hope that the writer builds up within your heart. Because first and foremost, romance is love.
This week, I read two very different books, both containing romantic elements and yes, uh-hum, love scenes. One a romance, one a thriller. Fine books, both. Black Rose by Nora Roberts, and 4th of July by James Patterson. If you compare the love scenes in 4th of July to the love scenes in Black Rose, you will immediately see the difference between sex and romance. Mr. Patterson (who, bless his heart, is working on his romantic craft) hasn’t quite mastered the art of romantic emotion. His love scenes were by the book, all the right words were there, even the emotive words, but it didn’t have the emotional resonance of Black Rose. And it didn’t carry the same punch. I thought that maybe if he’d given more page-space to their relationship, maybe then I’d think it was more romantic, but no, he put a lot of pages towards the love scenes, and too little towards the important stuff. Did I like the 4th of July? Yes, yes, I did. I liked it a lot. (Along Came a Spider is still my fav, though).
Perhaps the line between romance and sex has become blurred, and that disappoints me, because I’m a firm believer in love and romance. With or without sex, it doesn’t bother me. See, I’m an optimist by nature. I need to believe in the promise of love. And what if our lovers have sex? All right by me. Unfortunately in our society, sex rules and a lot of people confuse love with sex. I don’t like a world where society believes that love is just about sex. Love is bigger than sex. In my little piece of the world, love rules.
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Well said.
Love is when your child picks a flower from the yard and brings it to you. It’s when you don’t feel well, and you’re SO will do whatever they can to make you feel better. It’s friends who will sling their arm around you and tell you it will all be okay.
Sex is…well, sex.
I find it rather disappointing when I read a love scene, and all I receive in return is mechanics. I know what goes where. Give me some emotion! And it doesn’t necessarily have to be love. It could be lust. Or need. Or one of several different emotions.
Love does NOT equal sex and vice-versa.
They are two separate pieces of life. But sometimes they are connected, and that is when the magic happens.
Grins*
Great entry, Kathleen, and congrats on the unintented promotional quote. Wasn’t it Donald Trump who said there was no such thing as too much exposure?
Personally I wonder whether Romance as a genre is going to start becoming much stricter on how it classifies itself, for publishing and promotional purposes. With so many other genres lending elements from it for possible ‘mulit-genre’ sales and promotion, Romance itself is becoming dangerously diluted. This is already leading to new readers being put off when they pick up books with ‘Romance’ on the spine, only to discover that the book is say, a Mystery with romantic elements, as opposed to a strong, genuine Romance with a good mystery woven into the love story.
Great post, Kathleen. Nora Roberts does character SO well. Sigh.
I agree with you about romance — you can’t define it, really. Like you said — it’s the last page. Do you walk away happy, satisfied, filled with hope? So whether there’s a lot of action or a lot of sex, in the end was there any LOVE between the H/H?
I enjoyed your post, Kathleen. I’ve always thought of a romance as a story primarily about two individuals falling in love and ending in a HEA, but that’s simplistic at best. Many literary works have this formula, yet told in a way that separates it from romance for one reason or another. I think you said it well, but I do need my HEA and the genuine love between the h/h.
Natasha you’ve pinpointed exactly why I generally avoid romantic suspense books. Most of the ones that I read were some sort of criminal mystery plot, with some romance sprinkled on the side. I have no idea if those books were representative of the genre, but you know, once bitten twice shy.
I just stopped buying them.
I agree that love does not equal sex, and that it’s not all about sex but that it certainly can be expressed through sex (and lots of it
).
YAY on being quoted in the USA Today!!!
For me, the most memorable lovemaking scenes in romance novels are those where the reader is truly tapped into the emotions of the hero and heroine. When more than lust rules the motions, the scene is so much more relevant and enthralling.
Lovemaking definitely has a place in romance, but as Mary Stella says, they’re most memorable when the emotions are engaged. I’m a huge romantic, and I love the books that hit me in the heart.
Lovely post. I totally agree.
I think a big part of the problem these days is we’ve transformed into a society of people in need of instant gratification, and some writers might translate that need to “more sex! right now!” when that’s often not the case at all.
Sure, I love sex in my books, but it has so much more impact when there’s love involved.
Lynn,
I never thought about the instant gratification aspect, but I think you’re onto something.